Motherhood: Epiphany Moment
I was just sitting here after having the first conversation with a mom where I wasn't in mental crisis or crying or just overall fighting the demons in my head and wondered what it must feel like to be her. I was sitting here imagining how hard it is to have a child, ( I'm an adult but mom law states I am always her child) who you never know what kind of mood they will be in. I was sitting here thinking how emotionally draining that must be to have to be the calm one, the rational one, the one to risk the conversation and potentially set your child off, to try and get them to take care of themselves. To ask how they slept, if they took their meds, if they showered, if they made it to their doctors appointment. I was like damn that must suck. I really started feeling bad for my mom. You don't sign up for that. You don't always know what to say or what to do, and you risk with every conversation that they will cry and you won't fully understand why. Then, honest...