Tis the Season
Tis the season, what a complicated season it has become this year. I think I wrote a little while ago about being "stable" and the tailspin that sent me on. Why you might ask, because never in my life I have been the stable one. Passively suicidal, over dramatic, ten thousand emotions and a bit of a space cadet is what I am used to being called. SO imagine my surprise when I was sitting there in therapy and I was called stable. Typically I struggle this time of year. Seasonal depression and arthritis at my young age of 35 leave me often times lost in pain and in my head. NOW, now I got this new label. What happens when we go into a time of year that is normally hard for me and I fall all to pieces? Have I failed? Is it just my mental illness screwing up my life again? How do I function? Now let's add to this my weak immune system has already failed me and I have already had Bronchitis for a month. Yesterday I had one of the most intense flashbacks in my life and I s