Hello

 It's been a hard year, one of the hardest I have had in a while. I wrote the world's shortest obituary this year. I've said goodbye to too many people. I have been to too many wakes, too many funerals. I have picked up more diagnosis this year then well I think I have ever in one year.  I'm not doing so well health wise or mentally but you wouldn't really know. I put the mask on and go on like normal. It's easier to be numb and burry it. So I go to the meetings, I help, I check on others, I do all the things, because that's what I am supposed to do. I act like me, the outer shell is me. Inside, there's a war going on, and I am just trying to survive the demons that live in my head.  I scream from the roof tops check on your strong friends. I scream from the roof tops it's okay to not be okay. I scream from the roof tops you can't pour from an empty cup. I scream and I mean it, because inside these are my demons I am battling.  This year, I am on...

 The year of 2024 has been the year of death and goodbye. There are 12 months in a year, we just started December, and the number of people who meant something to me who we said our final goodbye's to is currently 11, ELEVEN. I'm going to spend the next month on pins and needles just trying to figure out if we hit 12. That's a lot of death.  One person I remember driving home from a vacation and getting the news. One I knew was sick and was going to go. One person, had cut me out of her life years ago, but on legal paperwork I was the last one listed, and I wrote her obituary. One person who passed, it was the closing to a horrible rotten chapter that I don't have to live through anymore. A few were sudden and surprising. A few lost their battles to addictions.  This is the year I walk away from far more jaded then I started. This is the year on top of losing people to death, friendships were severed, lines were crossed, and there is no going back. I am far to grown to ...